Feb 3, 2012

it is about us

So often I think it is about me. About us. About women.

Probably because I am one.

I think of our broken hearts, shredded and lonely, waiting and wondering if anything but Christ and loneliness will ever live here.

I think of tears cried in the darkness and at empty kitchen tables, and smiles forced over cups of coffee pretending stories of others’ togetherness are simply a source of joy.

I think of how it feels to wonder who and to wonder why and to wonder why no one ever just asks, because you never know unless you ask.

But I rarely consider the responsibility you bear, brother.

I rarely think of what it must be like to be the one to ask the question, to make the first move, as your broken, lonely, shredded heart beats a bit faster as you wonder what she will say.

I rarely think of what it must like to face the choice of relationship instead of independence, to choose to love another as Christ loves the Church. For the rest of your collective time on this earth.

Brother, that must be so daunting.

I do not know if I could handle that responsibility.

Of course I have my own responsibility to bear in that same agreement, for the rest of our collective time on this earth.

But, brother, I rarely consider your side.

I rarely wonder what you think or feel late at night in the darkness or at empty kitchen tables or over cups of coffee, or perhaps for you it is pints of beer and cigars.

Brother, I am sorry for thinking it is just me, it is just us, just women.

It is about us, men and women, with hearts on the mend, waiting and wondering if anything but Christ and loneliness will ever live here.

This post is also featured today on Good Women Project. Please take a second to check out their site.


Jennifer Bryant said...

Thank you. I needed to read this. I know those tears shed in an empty room, and those forced smiles while celebrating others' successful relationships. I experience them often. But I need to remember the other side of it. I need to remember that we are all broken and hurting and wondering when the loneliness may end. Thank you for reminding me.

Haley said...

@Jennifer, of course, and thank you for reading. And, just to be clear, I need the reminder too. So much. A lot. It's all part of believing there are Good Men out there.

kg6ejp said...

Great read Haley thank you for sharing! There are godly men out there; they are few and far between, but they are out there. Sadly there aren't too many out there discipling and raising up the next generation to do so. Some of us at my local church are working on that, thank God there was a godly mature man involved in my life that pointed out the need to train others.